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Sunday, October 24, 2021

‘My son died three months ago, my sister says I should stop talking about it’

Filed photo: A corpse

Losing a loved one is never an easy thing to go through – but it’s arguably even harder when that loved one is your own child.

And for one mum, her grief was made all the more immeasurable when she realised her family had no sympathy for her loss.

The distraught woman took to Reddit to explain she and her husband have five children – two toddlers, and triplets who were born just over five months ago.

Tragically, one of the triplets died when he was just two months old.

And while it’s difficult for her to talk about, the mum has made sure to keep including her son in conversation because he “deserves to be mentioned”.

She said: “Talking about babies is a touchy subject, as one would expect.

“Pretty quickly I started saying, ‘We had triplets but we lost one,’ or ‘We have five kids but one is an angel baby, to avoid awkward questions.

“I refuse to not talk about my son. He’s just as much my child as my other four, and he always deserves to be mentioned.

“When we’re talking to family, things can get a little awkward. I try not to correct anyone when they’re referred to as twins, even if it does upset me some.”

But the woman’s family does not seem to be noticing her attempts to sensitively navigate the situation.

The mum explained she had been temporarily living with her parents while her husband finds a place they can rent, and things between them recently reached boiling point.

She added: “My mum made a comment about my four children, I snapped and told her I have five kids, and she ought to remember that.

“My sister then got involved, and essentially told me to just ‘give up on my triplet dream’ because all I do is make everyone uncomfortable when I mention him.”

The woman was then branded “dramatic” and was told she would be “kicked out” if she didn’t calm down.

She said: “I was pretty inconsolable, and it delved into a fight after I’d got the kids upstairs.

“It wasn’t very long – maybe 10 minutes, I can’t leave the kids unsupervised – but in that 10 minutes, I called her a cold-hearted b***h, and told her she would never understand the suffering of losing a child.

“She called me dramatic, parents told me if I didn’t calm down they’d be forced to kick me out, so I went upstairs.

“That was three days ago. Everything has been10 times more awkward, and my sister is still acting all upset because I hurt her feelings.

“She basically told me my dead baby was unimportant, and I’m being treated like some kind of monster for insulting her.”

The mum also said she has since apologised to her sister just to keep the peace at home, but other Reddit users were quick to defend her in the comments.

One person wrote: “Triplet dream? Your children are triplets, it’s not a dream. You literally lost a child and your family’s approach is to act as the child never existed. I am so sorry for your loss.”

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